How they hate horny women

 

The Starling Girl (2023)

Directed by Laurel Parmet this film stars Eliza Scanlen, Lewis Pullman and Jimmi Simpson. A 17 year old girl living in a conservative Chrisitan community develops an attraction to her married youth pastor.

Very familiar yet still enjoyable this is a thoughtful look at the repression of female sexuality in conservative Christian communities. Nothing is melodramatic, the plot is handled with sensitivity. Highly enjoyable for those of us who are not fans of religious control.

4/5

Room to learn

 

The Lesson (2023)

Directed by Alice Troughton this film stars Richard E. Grant, Julie Delpy and Daryl McCormack. A phd student goes to help a writer's son with his entrance exams for Oxford.

A lot of this film is fairly familiar and despite seeming smart is a bit predictable. That being said the film is still a lot of fun mainly due to the cast. Likely I would watch anything with Julie Delpy or Richard E. Grant in it.

3/5

The case behind the case

 

Miranda's Victim (2023)

Directed by Michelle Danner this film inspired by real events stars Abigail Breslin, Luke Wilson and Sebastian Quinn. A sheltered 18 year old girl is kidnapped and raped on her way home from work.

This film tells the story of the young woman who had to testify twice against her attacker due to the Miranda rights ruling and while it does a good job of highlighting why Trish Weir is a hero it fails to tackle the issue of why Miranda's case was selected by the ACLU. I am sure there is a really good ethical discussion to be had around the events here but this film does not really tackle them. At time the film looks a bit cheap and the dialogue in need of a second pass, pretty sure all the budget went on a number of high profile actors in smaller roles.

3/5

Classic wheeze

 

Le Charpentier maladroit (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio and Georges Hatot this is an early short film. A man carrying a long plank of wood over his shoulder is careless about his surroundings as he turns round.

A classic slap stick gag played out several times in under a minute. Nothing that unique about this one but it is very familiar. You can see where Chaplin and Keaton would go from here.

3/5

two peas not in a pod

 

X to X (2023)

Directed by Lily Gwynne Thomas this film stars Tanya Reynolds in twin roles. A woman with an unhappy life meets her successful estranged sister for the first time.

A simple premise in this short film has a nice little twist to add a bit of spice to the ending. Nothing revolutionary but does enough to stick with you. Good performances from Tanya Reynolds to keep the two characters distinct.

3/5

Something fishy going on

 

Marche aux poissons (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a fish market at the docks.

A simple film of people selling fish by the docks. It is a little hard to make out the details on this one leaving you with only a general sense of people milling about. Not the best of the period.

2/5

Pretty funny

 

Relax, I'm from the Future (2022)

Written & directed by Luke Higgins this film stars Rhys Darby and Gabrielle Graham. A man from the future arrives in the present day and attempts to survive.

As low budget comedies go this one is fine, it has a few funny moments but is not laugh out loud through out. The plot works fairly well and does have something to say. Clearly the whole thing is carried on Rhys Darby's brand of weird so you need to like that to enjoy this film.

3/5

Crack(ed)berry

 

Blackberry (2023)

Directed by Matt Johnson this film loosely based on real events stars Jay Baruchel, Glenn Howerton and Matt Johnson. A small Canadian company becomes a mobile phone juggernaut.

Certainly the rise and fall of Blackberry is an interesting story however this film very much goes in for as much fiction as it does fact. The film is entertaining and funny, capturing something of that 90s nerd life but with straying so much from fact does it lose its way a bit? Fun even if not the final record on what happened.

3/5

Marching

 

Hallebardiers de la reine (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A military procession leaves a building and heads out onto the street.

Not a huge amount to this one, about all that is remarkable is the yellow tinting. Neither the subject or the location are that much of a stand out. Probably not worth seeking out.

2/5

People in costume at a castle

 

Entree du chateua dan le vieux Stockholm (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see the entrance to the old castle in Stockholm.

This is a fun little scene of people at the entrance to a castle. Maybe the shot could have been framed a bit better to show more of the castle but the action is entertaining enough. Not bad for what it is, very human.

3/5

Splash

 

The Cascade (1896)

Directed Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A bunch of people check out a water fall.

As shorts of the period go this one is fine, it captures a decent bit of something. Maybe not overly remarkable beyond the natural features. Pretty standard for the period.

3/5

Bridge over unseen waters

 

Le Caire, Kasr-el-Nil (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see people walking across a bridge.

The shot is such that you do not get any of the river in the shot which is a bit of a disappointment in my opinion. For what it is this is an average short of the period. Nothing remarkable here really.

2/5

Not savage

 

Fred (2023)

Directed by Franklin & Marchetta this short film stars Tom Brittney and Maxton Beesley Snr. The story of a look out on the RMS Titanic.

Looking into the history this short does take some slight liberties in simplifying the life of its subject, this was probably inevitable given the 5 minute run time though. A decent little biopic really for what it is. Fairly haunting.

3/5

No thanks

 

Sumotherhood (2023)

Directed by Adam Deacon this film also features Jazzie Zonzolo. Two idiots try make some fast money in the hood.

It is very rare I can not get all the way through a film but this was one of those rare occasions. There is nothing funny here and gags are very predictable. Ed Sheeran's cameo is especially crineworthy.

1/5

Baseball not rounders

 

Round the Horn (2024)

Directed by Matt Nelsen this film stars Bard Howe. A little league coach living off his former glories attempts to inspire the team he coaches.

A nice little send up of man familiar sports films. There may be no great shocks here but the short does enough to entertain. Well made and acted.

3/5

Down hill

 

Ligne d'Alger a Kolea: le grand ravin (1903)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see the view as the camera comes down the side of a hill.

It seems this one may be incomplete but what we do get is a nice shot. There is more than enough variety in what is on show here to entertain. Pretty enjoyable for a film of this type.

3/5

A little late

 

Panorama du port d'Alger (suite du precedent) (1903)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. The quays of the city as seen from a boat in the harbour.

By 1903 you are starting to expect a little more than a simple panorama from these Lumiere films. The shot is pretty good and covers a variety of subjects. Fine for what it is.

3/5

Leaving the station

 

Depart de Dunmurry (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A train leaves the station.

There is nothing particularly special to this one, the station seems to be a pretty average one as is the landscape that goes past. Nothing really stands out as unusual. Bit bland really.

2/5

Get off!

 

Norrstrom : debarquement (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A boat pulls into the quay and people get off it.

Not a huge amount to this one, just people getting off a ferry. You do not get to see a huge amount in the shot. Probably not worth seeking out.

2/5

A good use of AI?

 

Norrstrom: panorama (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see bridges from the river in Sweden.

There is a version of this short which has been colourised and given sound by AI which really brings it to life. I assume the base film is a standard panorama, many of which exist in the Lumiere catalogue. Not bad for what the original is.

3/5

Bumbling in the dark

 

Rumble Through the Dark (2023)

Directed by Graham & Parker Philips this film based on a novel stars Aaron Eckhart and Bella Thorne. A bare knuckle boxer who grew up an orphan and has memory problems owes money.

You can see the mood and atmosphere they film makers are going for here however the film just drags. The plot has too many contrivances to be of any interest. About half way in I just wanted it to get it over with already and the cheesy ending was not worth the wait.

2/5

At the beach

 

Panorama de la ville pris d'un bateau (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A short panorama of a beach.

Fairly decent for what it is, a standard panorama of the period. I would not seek this one out, it is a solid genre entry nothing more. Maybe a few minus points for not being an iconic location.

3/5

What a Judas

 

IV. Trahison de Judas (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Another part of the director's adaptation of the passion play.

That Judas, what a Judas. You can make out most of what is happening in the scene from the action with no need for dialogue. A decent entry into the series.

3/5

Like me in the morning

 

V. Resurrection de Lazare (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. One of the parts of the director's adaptation of the passion play.

A simple scene in which Lazarus is raised from the dead. Mostly fine for a film of the period. Nothing earth shattering in the execution, decent sets and costumes, nothing more.

3/5

Not a full lion

 

One Day as a Lion (2023)

Directed by John Swab this film stars writer Scott Caan, Marianne Rendon, J.K. Simmons and Frank Grillo. A man tries to get his son out of juvenile detention.

Essentially this is a Coen brothers lite film from star Scott Caan. Nothing special or remarkable happens here but there is the odd funny moment. Maybe could have leaned into the farce element a bit more.

3/5

Locked down

 

April 2020 Paris (2020)

Directed by Lucca Dahan-Fletcher this film has voices from Charlotte Gainsboug, Pauline Chalamet and Camelia Jordana. Three women living in Paris during the first Covid lock down discuss their experiences.

I do not think there is anything ground breaking or overly insightful here, the short does do a decent job of capturing a snap shot of time. As covid films go this one is not too bad. A slice of life if nothing else.

3/5

No Sandiego

 

Carmen (2022)

Directed by Benjamin Millepied this film tars Melissa Barrera and Paul Mescal. A former US marine helps a Mexican woman who has crossed the border illegally.

Dripping with atmosphere and style this film is something of a visual feast. My issues is that all the art is not really in service of much meaning and while the film may be inspired by the opera of the same name there is really little in common between the two. One to sit back and enjoy rather than think too much about.

4/5

Sparkly

 

Barbie (2023)

Directed by Greta Gerwig this film based on the dolls of the same name stars Margot Robbie, Ryan Gosling and America Ferrera. A disturbance in her mental well being leads Barbie to leave Barbieland and find the girl who is playing with her.

Enjoyable, weird, pointed, smart and funny there is a ton to enjoy in this film which is not surprising when it has Greta Gerwig behind it. I suppose the main criticism from some will be is this is too progressive and not enough of a children's film while for the rest of us maybe it is not progressive enough, I also thought there was a bit too much Ken for a Barbie film. In time I do not think this will hold up as the titan of feminism some are making it out to be, it is a massive step in the right direction and a lot of fun with some real heart too.

4/5

Tombed

 

XII. La mise au tombeau (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Another part in the director's adaptation of the Passion play.

Unfortunately a fair amount of the action in this one is just below the frame. Not the best shot entry in the series. What you can see of the costumes seems alright.

2/5

Not all bad after all

Cosmic Disaster (2021)

Directed by stars Nika Nurnett and Pauline Chalamet this is a short film. Two cousins live together with a settled routine.

I found this short to be a lot of fun, it is well constructed and comes with an enjoyable amount of oddity. The short really leans into the style and it is impressive to see it was shot in one day. Well worth seeking out in my opinion.

3/5

A bit of a dock up

 

Liverpool, entree dans Clarence Dock (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a dock in Liverpool.

Unfortunately this is an incomplete short that has a very stuttery effect to it. What survive is fine, nothing much special. Probably not worth seeking out given the incomplete form.

2/5

Bites

 

Ike Interviews God (2014)

Directed by Eli Shapiro this is a short film. An average man is selected to interview god but only on the topic of food.

For what it is this is a fairly decent little dark comedy. There may not be a huge amount to this one, it is at least thought provoking. The performance of the main actor is pretty good.

3/5

Is it though?

 

It's a Dog (2022)

Directed by Eli Shapiro this film stars David Rosenberg, Molly Carden and Daniel Jenkins. A man refuses to accept his impending baldness.

I am not sure I really agree that the man is bald, otherwise the film does a decent job of exploring he issue at hand. Pretty fun if not massively deep. A decent little short.

3/5

Carpenter poorly framed

 

XIII. La resurrection

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see the resurrection scene in a passion play.

Unfortunately what should be the final dramatic moment of this series is ruined by most of the action happening out of frame. Pretty hard to tell what is going on here. Big blunder really.

1/5

Not even close to what happened

 

Gran Turismo (2023)

Directed by Neill Blomkamp this film based loosely on a true story stars Archie Madekwe, David Harbour and Orlando Bloom. A teenage video game player enters a contest for the chance to become a real racing driver.

Unfortunately both video game adaptations and racing films produce some pretty bad films, this is another in long line for both. The script is pretty terrible from over relying on repeated plot elements to dialogue that needs a major rewrite. Probably worst of all in this film is the way it cheaply uses a real life tragedy, actually gross.

1/5

Vibrancy & Villain

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

Directed by Jeff Rowe this film has voices from Micah Abbey, Shamon Brown, Nicolas Cantu, Brady Noon, Ayo Edebiri and Jackie Chan. Four teenage mutant ninja turtles seek to be accepted in the human world.

What stands out most about this film is the vibrant animation style which is somewhat unique and fits well with the characters. The plot is no great shakes, it does a job. Ice Cube is definitely the stand out as the villain super fly.

3/5

Passing by

 

Paris: general Saussier et son etat-major (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Dragons take part in a military parade.

Clearly this is only a snippet of a larger parade. I suppose what we see go past the camera is fairly interesting even if it is a bit same-y. Not really worth seeking out.

2/5

On yer 'ead

 

Fort-de-France: femmes portant des corbeilles (1902)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Women carry stuff in baskets on their head.

Not a huge amount to this one either in foreground or background. A simple day to day scene which lacks something special about it. Unremarkable in the end.

2/5

Christ on the cross

 

XI. Le calvaire (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this short is part of the director's passion play series. Christ on the cross.

Well staged and fairly dramatic visual. There is not really a lot of action to this one but you do at least get some emotion from it. A decent film for the period.

3/5

Part two not good

 

II. La fuite en Egypte

Directed by Alexandre Promio & Georges Hatot this is an early short film. We see a scene with a back drop against a recreation of the sphynx.

I assume this is part of Promio's passion play series however it is definitely one of the weaker parts. It is hard to tell what is going on or how exactly this fits in with the story. Not the best or most recognisable part of the passion play.

2/5

Heavy is the head

 

Golda (2023)

Directed by Guy Nattiv this film based on real events stars Helen Mirren. We see the Yom Kippur War through the eyes of Israeli prime minister Golda Meir.

Obviously this is a pretty one sided look at events, the film never touches on Meir's reject of talks with Egypt in the months leading up to the war for example. I did enjoy the film and thought it provided a unique look into the burden of leadership in war through one of the few female war leaders of the modern era. The film does leave you with some questions over historical accuracy though.

3/5

Space man

 

Jules (2023)

Directed by Marc Turtletaub this film stars Ben Kingsley, Harriet Sansom Harris and Jane Curtain. A 79 year old man finds a UFO in his background and meets an alien.

I found this to be a fun and enjoyable film, you need to be able to enjoy a slower pace to be able to watch the gentle plotting in this one. There are a couple of really hilarious moments even if the film is not chock full of jokes. Captures something of the experience of old age and how we abandon our elderly.

3/5

Running on near empty

 

The Flash (2023)

Directed by Andy Muschietti this film stars Ezra Miller, Sasha Calle and Michael Keaton. Barry Allen finds he can travel back in time and prevent his mother's murder causing unforeseen consequences.

Despite what you might here this is actually not a terrible film in my opinion, it does a decent job of being an origin story without being an origin story. The time travel stuff is handled fairly well and having Michael Keaton back as Batman is awesome. Some of the humour is a bit out of place and you do kind of have to be a fan to enjoy all the references.

3/5

Dragons

 

Paris: dragons de l'escorte (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Soldiers on horse back take part in a parade.

Pretty much what it says on the tin. There is not a huge amount to this one and the parade could be happening anywhere really. Average short.

2/5

Market day

 

Arab Market (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a bustling Arab market.

Foreground action is plentiful in this short film. What is lacking compared to some films of the genre is an iconic or recognisable back drop to place this somewhere in the world. Fairly average street film all things considered.

2/5

Some people just want to go home

Good Night (2021)

Directed by David Vincent Smith this short stars Caroline Brazier and Clarence John Ryan. A sound engineer wants to go home for the day but is held up by one last client.

Covering a familiar “foot in mouth” situation there is not a huge amount to this short. The plot is fairly predictable, nothing special comes of the set up. Needs a bit more punch to it really.

2/5

The message mistake

Seasick (2021)

Directed by Lindsey Ryan this film stars Pauline Chalamet, Jimmy Brewer and Alexandria Benford. A young woman accidentally outs herself by mistakenly sending a message about her crush to her crush.

Sending a message to the wrong person is something we are likely all familiar with so it is pretty easy to identify with the protagonist of this short. If anything I think a bit more over the top version of this film might have worked a bit better, there is not quite enough comedy as is. Could have been better in my opinion.

2/5

Broken

 

Breaking (2022)

Directed by Abi Damaris Corbin this film based on real events stars John Boyega, Nicole Beharie, Selenis Leyva and Michael Kenneth Williams. A former US Marine threatens to blow up a bank if the VA does not pay him the money he is owed.

Sadly this is an all to familiar tale of the lack of care countries have for their veteran population. I have no idea how closely the film sticks to true events but the action on screen is certainly believable given the number of similar news stories. Well made and respectful enough to not be overly melodramatic.

4/5

Thorny

 

IX: The Crown of Thorns (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Part nine in the director's adaptation of the passion play.

Compared to some of the other scenes in this series not a lot happens in this one. Sure the staging is decent but it needs some action. Not much on its own.

2/5

Bee better

 

The Beekeeper (2024)

Directed by David Ayer this film stars Jason Statham, Emmy Raver-Lampman and Josh Hutcherson. A former secret agent goes on a killing spree after an elderly friend falls victim to fraud and kills herself.

There is not a huge amount to the plot of this film, it follows a similar pattern we are all familiar with by this point. The whole thing is just a bit basic and silly really, I expected more from a film directed by the guy who wrote Training Day. Even the action sequences are not good enough to carry the film.

2/5

Budget mortality

 

Everybody Die... Sometimes (2023)

Directed by Charlotte Hamblin this is a short comedy. A young woman believes everyone she get close to dies.

As dark comedies about mortality go this is fine I suppose, nothing amazing or overly original. Not a huge amount stands out. The acting is fine, nothing special.

3/5

Fronting

 

Bruxelles, la bourse (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. People pass in front of a neo-classical building.

The building providing the backdrop to this film could be in any one of a number of European cities, it is not that unique. Foreground action is fine, nothing special. An average street film of the period.

3/5

Inevitable escape

 

Time Lock (1957)

Directed by Gerald Thomas this film based on the play of the same name stars Robert Beatty, Lee Patterson and Betty McDowall. A six year old gets locked in a bank vault, can they get him out before the air runs out?

There is not a lot to this one, you know they will never let the kid die so it is just a case of waiting for the expert to turn up to save the day. I would actually be pretty interested to see how this one is supposed to be staged as a play given all the industrial machinery used in it. Really the only reasons for watching this is to see Sean Connery in an early bit part and that the writer of the original play went on to write Airport.

2/5

Life without love

 

L'immensita (2022)

Directed by Emanuele Crialese this film stars Penelope Cruz, Luana Giuliani and Vincenzo Amato. A loveless marriage in 1970s Italy seen through the eyes of a 12 year old with gender dysphoria.

A good look at a broken family. There may not be a huge amount to this one but it definitely captures a snapshot of the human experience. Well made and executed.

4/5

Just don't

 

Don't Look Up (2021)

Directed by Adam McKay this film stars Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Lawrence, Rob Morgan, Jonah Hill, Cate Blanchett and Merly Streep. An asteroid is coming to destroy the planet.

Initially about the climate crisis this film does get a little muddied with the influence of the covid-19 pandemic but is still a biting satire. We can all see how close to home this film hits after the events of the last few years. Not a laugh out loud comedy, definitely thought provoking.

4/5

Adam Drive goes Italian Part 2

 

Ferrari (2023)

Directed by Micahel Mann this film based on real events stars Adam Driver, Penelope Cruz, Shailene Woodley and Gabriel Leone. In 1957 the Ferrari company finds itself in need of a win at the Mille Miglia road race.

Not an entire biography of Enzo Ferrari this film does a good job of exploring the nature of the man through a small period of his life. The film seems to be fairly factual which is not always a given with Hollywood. An enthralling look at the passion and tragedy of the era in motor racing.

4/5

Whipped

 

VIII: The Flagellation (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see part eight of a passion play.

There is decent staging to this short but not much in the way of action really. Of the shorts I have seen in this series it is not one of the more exciting ones. Probably only worth seeing as part of the whole piece.

2/5

Watch Bill Gates die inside

The Launch (2023)

Directed by KK Apple this film stars Alyssa Limperis, Kate Sisk and Tien Tran. A recreation of the Windows95 launch with a gender flipped cast.

This short does a decent job of capturing the onstage awkwardness of the Windows95 launch. I am not sure what the entire point is but this is certainly a fun watch. If you enjoy the slightly bizarre then this is one for you.

3/5

Camel time

 

Biskra : une noce indigene (1903)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. People ride camels down the street.

Fairly entertaining foreground action with an average back drop. Nice to see some other parts of the world captured in the Lumiere catalogue. Decent street scene.

3/5

Duel

 

Deloping (2022)

Directed by Jon Olav Stokke this film stars Lola-Rose Maxwell and Eleanor Morton. In 1792 two women have a duel because “that is what the men do”.

Some of the dialogue on this short could definitely do with tightening up. The premise is fine, the execution is a bit on the weak side. Something more fitting of a youtube short than a short film in my opinion.

2/5

No elves

 

Red Right Hand (2024)

Directed by Ian & Eshom Nelms this film stars Orlando Bloom, Andie MacDowell and Scott Haze. A man trying to get away from his criminal past is drawn back into the criminal world to protect his family.

Nothing much is original here, this is a fairly familiar crime piece. Orlando Bloom is fairly unrecognisable as the protagonist, pulling off the rural American pretty well. Unless you are a big Bloom fan this one does not do much to stand out.

3/5

No thanks

 

Knights of the Zodiac (2023)

Directed by Tomek Baginski this film based on a manga stars Mackenyu, Famke Janssen, Madison Iseman and Sean Bean. In the near future Athena has been reborn into the body of a young girl and needs protecting by her knights.

Oh dear, what a load of rubbish this is. Once you get beyond the poor script the whole film is made on a budget that makes it look extremely cheap. Nothing at all to recommend this one on.

1/5

Out there man

 

Asteroid City (2023)

Written & directed by Wes Anderson this film has a large cast including Jason Schwartzman and Scarlett Johansson. We see a television show about a play about first contact with aliens.

Mixing together the usual tone of his films this one will be a joy for Wes Anderson fans, do not bother if you hate his films as this one will do nothing to change your opinion. What exactly is going on here is hard to say but it is funny, entertaining and just a bit thought provoking. Hopefully Wes Anderson keeps making these types of films because no one else ever could get close.

4/5

In Bruxelles

 

Bruxelles, Sainte-Gudule (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a street scene from Bruxelles.

A narrow street with a church at the end provides a really nice backdrop for this short. There is not a huge amount of foreground action, just enough that there are people moving about. A decent street film of the period.

3/5

Knock knock

 

Les tribulations d'une concierge (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio and Georges Hatot this is an early short film. A hotel worker is trolled by children.

Very simple in concept this is a surprisingly familiar set up for a comedy short. Pretty funny for what it is even if it does look a bit cheaply made. Not really that remarkable in the grand scheme of things.

3/5

Renamed

 

Sackville Street, Dublin (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a street scene from Dublin.

A very short snippet of a street scene. There is foreground action and an average back drop. Fine for what it is, nothing special.

3/5

A magical remake?

 

Entree du courtege royal a l'Exposition (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Members of the Swedish royal family arrive at an Exposition.

I watched a colourized version of this film and it really brought history to life. It is amazing what the addition of colour and sound does to these older films, it really elevates them. In the original form probably fairly mundane.

3/5

Dash away

 

Dashcam (2021)

Directed by Rob Savage this film stars Annie Hardy, Amer Chadha-Patel and Angela Enahoro. A woman who livestreams her life travels to the UK during the pandemic.

Found footage films with unlikeable protagonists are a tough sell. By about two thirds into this film it is hard to tell what is going on, as I no longer cared though that did not really matter. Not worth seeking out.

1/5

Familiar waters

 

Dangerous Waters (2023)

Directed by John Barr this film stars Odeya Rush, Eric Dane, Saffron Burrows and Ray Liotta. A 19 year old girl goes on a sailing holiday with her mother and her mother's new boyfriend.

A bit predictable and treading over fairly familiar ground this is still a decent enough genre piece. No this one will never set the world alight but Odeya Rush does enough to carry the film. You can not help wondering if Ray Liotta's character would have had a larger part to play were it not for the actor's unfortunate death during filming.

3/5

Reckoning the franchise to be nearly dead

 

Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023)

Directed by Christopher McQuarri this sequel star Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Ving Rhames, Simon Pegg and Rebecca Ferguson. A literal key is the key to unlocking a rogue AI.

By this point the franchise has gotten pretty tired and the plot of this one is a load of nonsense. There are not even really enough big stunts to carry the film. Something of a disappointment really.

2/5

Sinking feeling

 

Sunless (2023)

Directed by Boris Vessenlinov this film stars Ben Holtzmuller and Erik Scilley. Two men on a small submarine descend to a dangerous depth.

Submarines are always a good basis for taught drama and this short is fairly decent in that regard. There is no a huge amount to this one given the eight minute run time however it still captures a human moment at the end. Maybe not as scary as it could be given the ending.

3/5

Woods, finances and fashion

The Businessman (2022)

Directed by Nathan Ginter this short film stars Steven Gamble and Liviya Meyers. A school girl meets a businessman in the woods.

No doubt this short is very odd with some suitably creepy moments. I am not entirely sure what the thrust of the piece is even if it is entertaining. Smarter minds than mine may get more out of this.

3/5

Magic?

 

The Adoration of the Magi (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Part one of Promio's version of the pasion play.

A pretty simple scene involving the three kings at the birth of Jesus. There is not a lot of action here, the staging is at least decent. Nothing remarkable.

3/5

Lumbering along

 

Liverpool, panorama pris du chemin de fer electrique, III (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a shot of Liverpool's lumber yards and docks.

The foreground detail is pretty interesting in this one and it has to be to make up for the blown out sky as background. Decent moving shot from a train. A pretty average genre piece.

3/5

Desperately seeking original ideas

 

Desperation Road (2023)

Directed by Nadine Crocker this film based on the novel of the same name stars Garrett Hedlund, Willa Fitzgerald and Mel Gibson. A man just out of prison helps a young woman and her daughter.

Very familiar in content the film lumbers on to a fairly predictable conclusion. I suppose the film is mostly decent it just lacks originality. A bit forgettable in the end.

3/5

A very French film

 

Jules and Jim (1962)

Directed by Francois Truffaut this film stars Jeanne Moreau, Oskar Werner and Henri Serre. Two friends compete for the love of the same woman.

Of all the things I expected from French New Wave this was not really it. Certainly the central story is very French however the direction is not very New Wave, the film becomes more conventional the longer it goes on. The reputation of this film does surprise me a little even if there is nothing really wrong with it.

3/5

No Cruise

 

The Bricklayer (2024)

Directed by Renny Harlin this film based on the novel of the same name stars Aaron Eckhart and Nina Dobrev. A former CIA agent helps hunt down one of his former assets.

Clearly this wants to be a Tom Cruise film without the budget or talent that comes along with that. The plot makes little sense and the action sequences are not that impressive. Aaron Eckhart attempts to growl his way through the whole film which is not great either.

2/5

Blown out

 

Liverpool. Panorama pris du chemin de fer electrique, II (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a shot of some of the docks of the city of Liverpool.

Unfortunately this one is pretty blown out, it is not easy to make out much in portions of it. Not the best in the series. I wouldn't seek this one out.

2/5

Average shot

 

Long Shot (2019)

Directed by Jonathan Levine this film stars Seth Rogan and Charlize Theron. The US Secretary of State hires an unemployed journalist she used to baby sit to be her speech writer.

As with most rom-coms this one is fairly predictable in terms of plot. There are some decent moments of humour but nothing amazing. In places the plot definitely pushes the bounds of belief, if you can over look that you will be fine.

3/5

Ben is average

 

Ben is Back (2018)

Directed by Peter Hedges this film stars Julia Roberts and Lucas Hedges. A young addict in recovery returns unexpectedly to visit his family for Christmas.

As addiction films go this one is fine but covers a lot of familiar ground. There is nothing especially new or impressive here. A solid genre effort, nothing more.

3/5

More?

 

Le char funebre (1901)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A short clip from the funeral parade of Queen Victoria.

The shot is taken from a decent angle, good height to capture the action. Sadly only a small snippet of a historic event. Pretty decent for what it is.

3/5

Not worth one second

 

57 Seconds (2023)

Directed by Rusty Cundieff this film stars Josh Hutcherson, Morgan Freeman, Greg Germann and Lovie Simone. A blogger finds a ring that can take him back in time 57 seconds.

I can only assume all the budget of this film went on the cast because it looks super cheap. The script is in no way good either, stumbling through some sci-fi claptrap. Not at all worth watching.

1/5

What went wrong?

 

Hypnotic (2023)

Directed by Robert Rodriguez this film stars Ben Affleck, Alice Braga and William Fichtner. A police detective attends a bank robbery seemingly connected to his missing daughter.

Clearly this film wants to be some sort of Inception meets Firestarter type thing and despite all the talent involved it falls far short. There are X-Files episodes that do this concept better. Maybe with some major rewrites of the script you could get something decent out of this.

2/5

Bore-door-ed

 

Insidious: The Red Door (2023)

Directed by star Patrick Wilson this film also features Ty Simpkins and Rose Byrne. A man and his son heading to college struggle with missing memories.

When you come into the third film in a series having seen none of the previous entries things are always going to be a struggle. By the end of the film I had lost all interest in what was going on. There are some scary moments but my engagement with the story was pretty low by that point.

2/5

Exploitation

 

Bethleem, une place (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. A street scene from the Biblically famous town of Bethlehem.

A bunch of people scramble over something unseen, the implication being they are beggars fighting for alms dropped by the film makers. The implication of the action leaves something of a bad taste, making the poor perform for our entertainment. Not my preferred of the Lumiere catalogue.

2/5

The final journey

 

Homeward (2019)

Directed by Nariman Aliev this film stars Akhtem Seitablaev and Remzi Bilyalov. A Crimean Tatar and his son attempt to take his other son home to be buried.

An interesting look at the cultural differences in the Ukraine and the problems facing people after the annexation of Crimea by Russia. Clearly the film makers did not know worse was to come for Ukraine but this is still a good look at the state of the nation and the people in it. Definitely worth seeking out.

4/5

A load of ships

 

Liverpool, panorama pris du chemin de fer electrique, I (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a shot of ships at dock in Liverpool.

A moving shot makes a change from so many of the static ones in the period. The variety of ships and industrial buildings is fine. Image quality of the version I saw was not great.

3/5

Racist women

 

Soft & Quiet (2022)

Written & directed by Beth de Araujo this film stars Stefanie Estes, Olivia Luccard and Dana Millican. A kindergarten teacher organises a women's group for racists and seeks revenge against a local Asian woman.

I am not sure using the gimmick of shooting the whole film in a seemingly continuous shot adds much here, it is well done but is there a reason? The plot itself challenges views that women are less racist than men. A film that does not sit well for a variety of reasons.

3/5

Lies from truth seekers

 

Jesus Revolution (2023)

Directed by Jon Erwin & Brent McCorkle this film inspired by real events stars Joel Courtney, Jonathan Roumie and Kelsey Grammer. We follow the growth of Christianity in the hippy movement of the late 60s.

If this was a worts and all look at the central figures then this could have been a pretty interesting film but it is just Christian propaganda. The film nearly entirely glosses over any controversial parts of the main figure. Disappointing in the end.

2/5

Six O'clock

VII: The Arrest of Jesus Christ (1898)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film part of a longer series recording the passion. Jesus gets the six o'clock knock.

Somewhat dramatic for the single scene it depicts. The staging and costume are not bad. Decent little early film.

3/5

Prime-al

 

Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (2023)

Directed by Steven Capel Jr. this film stars Anthony Ramos, Dominique Fishback and the voice of Peter Cullen. Humans and autobots must work together to stop bad robots bringing a planet killer to Earth.

So there is not a lot to this film but what it does it does fairly well. The action sequences are decent and the plot is not horrific. A fun action film with a bit of heart to it.

3/5

Lazy writing about lazy writers

 

Late Night (2019)

Directed by Nisha Ganatra this film stars Emma Thompson and writer Mindy Kaling. A young woman joins the all male writing staff for a late night television show hosted by a woman.

Through out I thought the script was just a bit too comfortable and predictable. There are some funny moments but just too many of the supporting characters have no depth to them. Not as good as it could have been.

2/5

Out of depth

 

The Courier (2020)

Directed by Dominic Cooke this film based on real events stars Benedict Cumberbatch, Merab Ninidze, Rachel Brosnahan and Jessie Buckley. A British businessman is recruited to act as the go between for MI6 and the CIA with a Russian asset.

It seems that at least the final part of this film strays somewhat from historical record. For the most part this is a decent look at an unusual character caught up in cold war espionage. Ultimately a bit middle of the road despite the best efforts of Cumberbatch.

2/5

A bridge in Belfast

 

Belfast: Queen's Bridge (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a street scene from a bridge in Belfast.

A classic example of the genre. Nothing is remarkable here, just a solid piece of foreground action with an average back drop. As always an iconic background would help elevate the film.

3/5

From behind

 

Cairo, Artillery Parade (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. An artillery parade goes through the streets of Cairo.

Marrying up a decent background with solid foreground action this is a pretty good film for the genre. My only real complaint here is that the parade is shot from behind. Enjoyable despite the flaw.

3/5

Not haunting

 Haunting of the Queen Mary (2023)

Directed by Gary Shore this film stars Alice Eve and Joel Fry. Ghosts aboard the Queen Mary take the souls of visitors from time to time.

The plot of this film is convoluted and poorly explained. By the time the film reached its conclusion I had lost all interest in what was going on. Pretty disappointing really despite the atmospheric potential of the setting.

2/5

Needs fixing

 

No Hard Feeling (2023)

Directed by Gene Stupintsky this film stars Jennifer Lawrence and Andrew Barth Feldman. A woman in her thirties is hired to date a rich 19 year old by his parents to bring him out of his shell.

Clearly the plot of this film is walking a line between making its characters completely unsympathetic by their actions and for the most part it stays the right side. Unfortunately I think there are a few times that the film misses the mark, a re-write of a few scenes would really help clean things up in my opinion. There are some funny moments but this one will not stand the test of time due to its flaws.

2/5

What cannons?

 

Beyrouth, place des canons (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a street shot outside a palace in Beirut.

Foreground action is fine, I am just not sure we see enough of the palace in the background. As street scenes go this is a pretty average one. Not overly remarkable.

3/5

A lot of on lookers for an assassination

 

Mort de Robespierre (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio & George Hatot this is an early short film. A recreation of the assassination of Robespierre.

As historical shorts go this one is fairly decently staged. The cast might be a little on the large side, there are a decent number of people just milling about complicating the image. Overall a good enough film of the period.

3/5

One of two

 

Dublin, pompiers: Un Incendie, I (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is the first part of a two part short film. Firefighters race along a street in Dublin.

Similar in content to many other firefighter films of the genre. The action is decent, the background is unremarkable. Not much to set it out from other films like this one.

3/5

Mellow

 

Yellow (2023)

Directed by Elham Ehsas this short film stars Afsaneh Dehrouyeh along side the director. A woman in Taliban occupied Afghanistan goes to buy a full body covering.

Despite being Oscar nominated I thought this film was just a bit too obvious. There is not much that is subtle about this one. An important issue but needs a bit more depth to it.

2/5

Not the best

 

The Tiger's Nest (2022)

Directed by Brando Quilici this film stars Sunny Pawar, Claudia Gerini, Amandeep Singh and Yoon C. Joyce. A boy escapes an orphanage and rescues a tiger cub from poachers.

Clearly this film is aimed at children so the story telling is fairly heavy handed. I would have much preferred if this had been a locally made film rather than a western production imposing its ideas on the region. Not really worth a watch.

1/5

Not all Gucci

 

House of Gucci (2021)

Directed by Ridley Scott this film based on real events stars Lady Gaga, Adam driver, Jared Leto, Jeremy Irons and Al Pacino. Driven by his wife a young man seeks control of the family fashion empire.

Visually there is is a lot to look at here, plenty of eye candy and nice shots. I am not sure that the script ever really gets to grips with its characters, particularly Maurrizio as I could never pin point the moment he changes. All in all a bit empty in my opinion.

3/5

Shot

 

One More Shot (2024)

Directed by James Nunn this sequel stars Scott Adkins, Waleed Elgadi, Meena Rayann, Michael Jai White and Tom Berenger. Our hero tries to find out where a bomb is in an airport under siege.

Compared to the previous film in the series this one lacks clear geography and plot, it is just too confusing as to what is going on at times. The single shot gimmick is not enough to carry this one. A disappointment as I actually liked the original.

2/5

Not to be fixed?

 

Sound of Metal (2019)

Directed by Darius Marder this film stars Riz Ahmed, Olivia Cooke and Paul Raci. A drummer must come to terms with losing his hearing.

It is fairly clear from the get go where this film is going yet it still manages to do so without being cliché or melodramatic. I thought the film did a fairly good job of capturing what it was like for a man to find himself suddenly deaf. Decent performances help carry the film.

4/5

Standard

 

Liverpool, Lime Street (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see a simple street scene from the city of Liverpool.

As street scenes go this is a decent one marrying up backdrop with foreground action. There is a good balance between the two key elements. Solid genre entry.

3/5

Flappy birds

 

Pelicans, London Zoological Garden (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see Pelicans in a small pool or pond.

The image quality of this one is not great. There is a lot of stutter and general poor quality. Not the best surviving film in the Lumiere catalogue.

2/5

Not quite a famous painting

 

VI. La cene (1898)

Directed Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see the last supper as part of a Passion play.

Not a lot actually happens during the scene, you have to be watching carefully to recognise key moments. I suppose given the period this is a decent enough film. Captures something of the famous piece of art on the subject.

3/5

No bones of contention

 

Little Bone Lodge (2023)

Directed by Matthias Hoene this film stars Joely Richardson, Neil Linpow. Sadie Soverall and Harry Cadby. Two brothers arrive at a remote farm in need of assistance but nothing is as it seems.

There are some fairly good twists in this thriller, nothing is overly predictable. Sure it may never be more than a genre piece, still a decent watch though. Keeps you on the edge of your seat fairly well.

3/5

The forgotten Irish

 

The Siege of Jadotville (2016)

Directed by Richie Smyth this film based on real events stars Jamie Dornan, Mark Strong, Jason O'Mara and Guillaume Canet. Irish soldiers serving as peace keepers in the Congo during the 1960s find themselves abandoned and attacked.

You could say this is a marginally less colonialist and more Irish version of Zulu and it sort of is. The film does not entirely stick to historical events, the attempts to reach the encircled Irishmen by Indian and Swedish forces is cut out. It also seems some of the action might be sexed up a bit for the big screen.

2/5

A film too far

 

Fast X (2023)

Directed by Louis Leterrier this film features the usual cast plus Jason Momoa. Our heroes find themselves on the run from a villain after revenge.

Convoluted from the start if you are not a deep fan of the franchise it takes a while to get your bearings on this one, the cast of characters has gotten rather large and the film annoyingly ends on a cliff hanger. There are some of the usual stunts which are fairly entertaining, just try not to think too much about the plot as there are a few places it starts to not make sense really. Of all people Vin Diesel is the one who looks like he is phoning it in.

2/5

the blow out 1896

 

New York, patineurs au Parc central (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. People rollerskate in central park.

The issue with this short is in the version I saw it is completely blown out making it very hard to see what is going on. Unfortunate as the film hints at being fairly entertaining. Possibly needs some restoration work done on it.

2/5

Trams

 

New York, Avenue et Union Square (1896)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. We see trams pass a street corner in New York.

As street scenes go this one has a decent amount of foreground action to keep you entertained. About all that is missing is an iconic backdrop to help orientate you in the world. A decent example of the genre.

3/5

The same today

 

Garde descendante du Palais Saint James (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio this is an early short film. Military palace guard march past the camera.

Like many of these early films there is not a huge amount to this one. We see a scene that could be replayed today as not much has changed when it comes to palace guards in London. Not a particularly special short.

2/5

Hang the messenger

 

Assassinat de Kleber (1897)

Directed by Alexandre Promio and Georges Hatot this is an early short film. A military figure is assassinated.

This dramatic recreation is of a historical event I am unfamiliar with. It takes a bit too long for this short scene to get going, too many unnecessary characters file I before the assassin. Not my favourite of the early Lumiere stuff, a bit amateur dramatics really.

2/5

Greed in '44

 

Sisu (2022)

Directed by Jalmari Helander this film stars Jorma Tommila, Aksel Hennie, Jack Doolan, Mimosa Willamo and Onni Tomila. As the Nazi's feel Finland they rob a gold digger who turns out to be a former Finnish Commando.

As action films go this one is decent, there are some good set pieces. Sure this is not the most realistic film either in terms of the action or getting to grips with Finland's complex WW2 relationships. A fun watch if nothing else.

3/5