A web of disappointment

 

Madame Web (2024)

Directed by S. J. Clarkson this film stars Dakota Johnson, Sydney Sweeney, Isabela Merced and Celeste O'Conno. A New York paramedic starts getting premonitions of the future and tries to protect three young women.

It feels bad to pile on the negative train for this film but it just never does anything well. The fact the film has four writers is never a good start, you keep waiting for everything to come together and it never really does. This is just some scenes strung together haphazardly and little to no character on the screen.

2/5

Knight and squire

 

The Mysterious Knight (1899)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man makes a drawing that comes to life.

As with many Melies films this is a combination of camera trick and nice back drop. The content is pretty decent for what the film is. No great surprises but fairly entertaining.

3/5

Seeing things

 

The Hallucinated Alchemist (1897)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. An alchemist falls asleep in his laboratory and has some strange dreams.

A short part of a larger, lost film this is a film fun film. The special effects and hand colouring are really well done. Definitely a good example of the magic of Melies's films.

3/5

A partial web

 

The Spider and the Butterfly (1909)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A magician makes a butterfly woman appear, then a spider woman.

Unfortunately this is only a surviving fragment of a longer film and it shows, the opening in particular is a bit disconnected. While I enjoy the colour tinting and set dressing by 1909 the film is lacking a bit in plot. A glimpse of what was even if not the full thing.

3/5

Cutting

 

Barber (2023)

Directed by Fintan Connolly this film stars Aidan Gillen. A private detective is hired by an old woman to find her missing 20 year old granddaughter.

As films of this type go there is not a lot special to the plot, the trappings do a fairly decent job of showcasing some of the social liberalising Ireland has undergone in the last decades. To be honest the ending felt a bit abrupt and not overly satisfactory. Decent for what it is but not a stand out genre effort.

3/5

Love in space

 

If You Were the Last (2023)

Directed by Kristian Mercado this film stars Anthony Mackie and Zoe Chao. Two astronauts lost in space try to decide if they should bang or not.

I really enjoyed this one, it takes the long dead romantic comedy and puts something of a fresh twist on it. Maybe the final third is a bit of a dip in quality but otherwise it is a lot of fun. Very relatable to those of us that lived through the pandemic.

3/5

The longest strip in history

 

Going to Bed Under Difficulties (1900)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man attempts to get undressed for bed.

Changing it up from other Melies films instead of the protagonist being trolled by the furniture this time he is trolled by clothing. The short is pretty funny although maybe it does go on a little longer than necessary. Decently done for the period.

3/5

Dummy

 

The Fat and Lean Wrestling Match (1900)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. We see a series of wrestling matches.

Unfortunately the special effect here is pretty obvious and does not hold up well. I am sure I have either seen this one before or at least parts of it under another name. Not exactly WWE.

2/5

Devilish

 

The Devil and the Statue (1901)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A statue turns into the devil and menaces a woman.

It takes a little while for the devil to show up given the short run time but it is mostly worth the wait. This is a fun little combination of trick photography, a nice set and some decent costumes. I am not sure if this is supposed to be a specific story from folklore or not, if so the context is lost on me.

3/5

A princely misstep

 

The Prince of Magicians (1901)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man does a number of magic tricks.

For the most part stuff is familiar and works well here. The only trick that really lets the film down is the one with the obvious card board cut out. One weak point drops this just below the bar of what you expect from Melies.

2/5

haunted furniture again

 

The Bewitched Inn (1897)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man stops at an inn for the night.

Covering the familiar Melies territory of haunted furniture this is a decent little short. The slapstick comedy works fairly well even if it is not that unique. Image quality is surprisingly good for the age of the film.

3/5

Monster monster

 

The Monster (1903)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. An Egyptian prince seeks to raise his wife from the dead.

If the image quality of this one was better it would be pretty good, as is the camera is a bit far from the action to make out what is going on. The backdrop for the film is pretty impressive so the image quality short comings are a real shame. Would be better if there was a better version out there.

2/5

Daddy issues

 

Daddio (2023)

Written & directed by Christy Hall this film stars Dakota Johnson and Sean Penn. A young woman takes a taxi ride from the airport to her home and has a conversation with the taxi driver.

To be honest I was pretty disappointed with this one, there was nothing new or fresh about it. The subject matter is boringly familiar and nothing about the execution sparks. Not one I would recommend, might work better as a play.

2/5

They came from below

 

Arcadian (2024)

Directed by Benjamin Brewer this film stars Nicolas Cage, Jaeden Martell and Maxwell Jenkins. In a post apocalyptic future a man tries to raise two teenage sons.

Nothing especially stands out as new here, this is basically just a solid genre entry. When Nicolas Cage is involved you are hoping for something a little bit more crazy but this one never really gets that out there. Fine for what it is, will likely be forgotten fairly quickly.

3/5

Remakeable

 

L'Illusionniste fin de siecle – Remake (1900)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. An does a number of illusions with a woman.

Even in the early days cinema loved a remake. The image quality of this one seems to be pretty poor unfortunately. You can just about make out a nice series of camera tricks.

2/5

Cheater?

 

A Woman Surprised (1898)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A couple about to get down to business are surprised by another man.

Very simple in terms of content, you sort of have to figure out the plot a bit yourself. The image quality is not the best as this one only survives as a flip book. Not the best of early Melies.

2/5

A rabbit from a hat

 

D. Devant, Conjurer (1897)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man pulls a rabbit from a hat.

A simple trick simply captured. Existing only as a flip book the image quality is not the best here. Not a lot to go on really.

2/5

Trolled by the furniture

 

Fantastic Dining Room (1899)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man and two women sit down to have a meal only to get trolled by the table and chairs.

Similar to other Melies films this is a pretty good slapstick comedy. The only thing that really lets the film down is the image quality of the version I saw, it is pretty scratched up. A fun little comedy for the period.

3/5

We all went on holiday

 

Aftersun (2022)

Written & directed by Charlotte Wells this film stars Paul Mescal and Frankie Corio. A woman remembers a holiday to Turkey she took with her father when she was 11.

I love the way this film captures so many specific elements of a family holiday of the period, there are things many of us can relate to here. The coming of age element of the film also works well and the film does a good job of asking how well we really know our parents. Equal parts familiar and heart breaking.

4/5

Crashes, doesn't burn

 

Black Box (2021)

Directed by Yann Gozlan this film stars Pierre Niney, Lou de Laage and Andre Dussollier. A man working as an air crash investigator looks into a passenger liner's crash in the mountains.

As thrillers go this one owes a bit to Blowup and its descendents. The plot is both a little predictable and a bit fanciful at times, a bit more grounded of a take might have helped. Still functions as a solid thriller that keeps you watching even if you can work out what is happening.

3/5

Sinks

 

Night Swim (2024)

Written & directed by Bruce McGuire this film stars Wyatt Russell and Kerry Condon. The family of a man with MS move into a swimming pool that has magic healing powers and is also haunted.

Much of the plot of this film is similar to other horror films from the Blumhouse Productions studio. Nothing is a surprise here, you are just waiting for things to hit their inevitable conclusion of male self sacrifice. Not much to recommend this one on.

2/5

swords up

 

Fencing at the Joinville School (1897)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. Two people have a short fencing match.

For surviving only in flip book form the image quality of this short is surprisingly high. An enjoyable little clip in my opinion. Pretty fun for what it is.

3/5

A familiar episode

 

A Midnight Episode (1899)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A man in bed is bothered by a bug.

I thought I had already seen this one however it was a similar film with a much larger bug. Fine for what it is as a early comedy. No great shakes really.

3/5

Venus too

 

An Irritable Model (1897)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. An artist attempts to molest a model posing as Venus.

Like many of these films that survive only as flip books the quality is not the greatest. The action, such as it is, is nothing special either. Not my favourite.

2/5

No bridegroom

 

The Bridegroom's Dilemma (1898)

Directed by Georges Melies this early short film stars Mlle Barral. A young woman is undressed with the aid of her servant.

Despite the title the bridegroom barely appears in this short. There is the implication of something saucy but nothing really happens on camera. Not the best at being what it claims to be.

2/5

Crumbling

 

Concrete Utopia (2023)

Directed by Um Tae-hwa this film based on a webton stars Lee Byung-hun, Park Seo-joon and Park Bo-young. Following a massive earthquake only one apartment block in all of Seoul still stands.

Proving you do not need zombies for a good post apocalyptic film this film is a nice look at the nasty side of humanity. The plot does a good job of looking at how people put their own interests first and become hypocritical rather quickly. Well made and well acted.

4/5

Lost its way

 

Parallel (2024)

Directed by Kourosh Ahari this film based on the Chinese film Parallel Forest stars Danielle Deadwyler, Aldis Hodge and Edwin Hodge. A woman who blames herself for her son's death becomes lost in a forest of parallel worlds.

No doubt this film starts off with an interesting concept I am just not sure it does much with it. I am also not sure the ending works thematically, that is just not how the human experience is sadly. Fine for what it is, just could have been more.

3/5

Unbalanced

 

A Soldier's Unlucky Salutation (1896)

Directed by George Melies this is an early short film. A soldier sitting on one end of a bench stands up causing the bench to tip up.

A very simple comedy short based around a familiar gag. The quality of these shorts that survive as flip books is not amazing. Fine for the period I suppose.

2/5

In the box

 

Boxing Match (1897)

Directed by Georges Melies this is an early short film. A clip of two men boxing.

If this was a digital film you would say it is pixelated in place. For a boxing match there seems to be a lot of kicking going on! Fun if rudimentary.

2/5